to love and be loved

Not a day goes by without having Japan on my mind. I feel sorrowful for the land I love, the most altruistic and loving people known to mankind and the whole overall, ongoing situation. I participated on the blogger's day of silence. I have to admit it wasn't easy because there's a lot I've been wanting to say about everything. But through the silence, I contemplated about a lot of things. I've thought about life and I've thought about people. People have been worried about themselves being exposed to radiation. People have been overreacting and panicking. These people aren't even directly affected by the situation in Japan. I'm not worried about myself. I'm more worried for the people in Japan. What about those in Japan without a shelter, food, clothing and water? What about those who don't have the basic necessities to survive? What about the Fukushima 50 who are sacrificing their own lives to save their country and to save other lives? I've been teary-eyed and touched by all the stories about self-less, brave and genuinely loving people in Japan who are still helping and sharing with neighbors and strangers. In such heartache and afflicting circumstances, the Japanese are gracious, humble and respectful to everyone. They are the definition of to love and be loved. The whole world can learn a lot from Japan.
Throughout the silence, I've also had an epiphany. I was reading and watching the news about Japan. All I want to do is reach out and help everyone there. I've been struggling to find reason to learn physiology. But then, at that moment, I knew why and found a reason to learn physiology. I want to help others and I can't do this without having a basic understanding about the way our bodies work.
For the past few years, I've been going on a dental humanitarian trip to China. There are two dental trips our team is involved with this year and I'll be going on one of them. Last year, I planned on going on both trips. But now, I am determined to go to Japan to help in any way I can. It only feels right for me to help Japan and I am hoping I can go there to reach out and do all that I can for people in need.
Japan, I love you. I think of you often and I pray for you. All of you are in my heart.


the cherry blossom weeps

image via quilt sandwich
I've always had this love for Japan. I've loved the people, the food and everything about Japan. I truly want to move there someday, but maybe when I have a grasp of the language. I've been there almost too many times to count, my passports filled with stamped Narita stickers. I always want to go back to Japan. I was even planning to go there in two weeks. But the earthquake and tsunami has made the world come to a standstill.
I first heard the news late last night on twitter. But I don't think the news really hit me until I woke up this morning. My mom told me about cancelled flights in Japan and a plane that landed in Tokyo when the earthquake happened. We have a Japanese friend, whose family is thankfully safe. She e-mailed us saying she couldn't sleep because it was her people on the line. I read the news and I didn't get out of bed until almost noon. I stayed under the covers, pretending the world isn't coming to an end. That thought never worked. When I finally did get out of bed, I watched some of the footage of what was happening. I couldn't believe any of it. What I was seeing looked like an apocalypse in the movies. But I knew all of this was very real.
All day, I've felt this heartbreaking sadness for all the victims. The sun came out and the weather was warm enough to go without a sweater, but there was this silence in me. The people I talked with seemed to go on with their own lives as though what's happening on the other side of the world isn't affecting them over here. I don't understand their unsympathetic tone because we live on one of the most major earthquake fault lines.
I keep thinking how everything could be gone, your family and friends, your home and the world you once knew, believed, dreamed, hoped and lived in. How many lives and lost ones have been affected?
My heart, thoughts and prayers go out to Japan. My family has donated to the relief efforts. I'll continue to help out in every way I can and I'll keep praying. I hope everyone who can contribute will help in some small way for the victims and families affected.


i went down to the crossroads

I've been saying this for ages, but I really want an electric guitar (and maybe a lap steel guitar after today's discussion in World Music). Seeing Eric Clapton live has made me appreciate blues, rock n' roll, jazz and improvisation a lot more. I've also been inspired me to know my guitar inside out. I want to jam, rock and shred on the fretboard like this music legend who is real.


from the rockies to red rocks

This weekend, our family took a little road trip to Las Vegas. We drove past red rocks, through a carved out crevice and a barren desert. I've lived my entire life in Utah and this was one of the very few times I've seen my home all in its natural glory. After the 12 hour round trip and 900 miles, I still want to be on the road. I long for trips to nearby towns and must-see places around the rockies. And I must say...it's been a lovely weekend.


ramble on

Is it weird I find some things nostalgic, even if I was never really there? I told my mom I should have been born in the '70s. Listening to George Harrison and Bob Dylan explain some of this.
Music is my forte. I am avant-garde.
Being a music guide to discovery is teaching me patience and I'm learning more than I ever imagined. Also, I'm in the process of listening to reggae.
I like surrounding myself with other artists. I am always captivated to meet other people who walk around with notebooks of ideas. There's always someone cooler than you and it's not hard to believe, but a humbling experience each time. I'm driven to work harder in art and music.
I keep thinking I am J, at least when I'm at the studio. By the end of the night and a long day, I drive under the streetlights and I breathe and perceive life is harder than I thought, yet well worth the struggles. It's always much easier said than done.